An ode to my best friend.....

If any of you out there reading this.....have ever been so lucky to have a "best friend" in your life.....WOW!!! What else can I say? We are truly the lucky ones. I consider my best friend, almost like my other self. She knows when I'm good....she knows when I'm bad. And as much as I hate it.....I know she truly worries about me. And I am sorry for that. I just want to take this time to tell you that I LOVE YOU SO UNBELIEVABLE MUCH!!!! It should be a crime! :)
You are my comfort zone......my peanut butter to my jelly.....my ooooh to my ahhhhh. Basically.....with out one of these....it's ok......but it's not AMAZING. I miss my peanut butter. A whole lot. I know I kinda fell off the face of the earth for awhile there.....and I tend to do it a lot.....not making excuses for it - but seriously, not very adult of me either. I don't want it to always be about "me".......let's do more of "you"......You have so much exciting things in your life going on and I want to be a part of all of it. Arms open wide.....ready to receive all you have to give.

Honestly, Paige, If you are reading this. Talking to you tonight - well, I needed it to say the least. I don't think I have ever experienced a love like the love I have for you. It's an unguarded love. A protected love. An unconditional love. A true love that I would never hold any falsehoods. Basically, I want you to know how lucky I feel to have you in my life. Honored to have you in my life. You have always picked me up.....dusted me off....and told me it was ok. Regardless the circumstance - in your eyes - I was good to go. And I love that. That you were/are always there for whatever it is that I need.

Everyone should have a Paige in their life.

I don't know what I would have done without mine.

I love you Paige!!!!!

Daddy!!!!!!

I guess this is just an ode to my daddy. I love him very much, miss him what feels like even more. Wouldn't it be nice if things were kindergarten easy? .......it still wouldn't be though. I love him and I know he loves me but it would be nice to be able to experience that love.

I know we both have so many questions for the other........and I'm sure that one day they will all be answered. But when I look at the two of us in this picture. I see....pride.....I see a Father who is proud to be standing next to his daughter. I also see a daughter who is so proud to have her dad standing next to her. He kept me going that day. I was so scared. I remember standing outside the church doors.....just a jogging in place with my arm locked into his........He was my strength.

I miss my dad a lot. I remember when we use to go the end of the road (to the circle) where we use to live and it was a huge field..............a huuuuuuuuuge field that made me feel completely small......and wonderful. We would shoot skeet out there. Well, he would shoot it, but I was his handy skeet puller. Hahaha - amazing how much fun that was. And I'll never forget that black BB gun with the infrared site on it. WOW......I remember going outside and the entire backyard was draped in black.....from all the black birds I had taken down.......My dad and I always "did" things together - cool stuff......but we never really talked....you know how us women do.......and I have to say that I miss him.......and all the cool stuff we use to do!!! I love you dad!

Can you even imagine........

This is me when I was about......I'd say 6 or 7. Look at that ATTITUDE! BAM! Curlers in my hair. Jellies on my tootsies. Panama Jack shirt on - waiting for the rest of hair and makeup to be finished. Wow............

It's funny because looking at this little girl right here....I don't see myself there. The girl I see here is snazzy. Prissy. She knows what comes after part B. And she is waiting on it. She is looking for.....Perfect.

Then here is me.....hair probably not washed....a bandanna that was used from ( I don't want to know who), goggles.....but take a moment to look into my eyes. Ha! I see happiness there. I remember this day - I hated my outfit, couldn't believe had to wear not only these ridiculous goggles....but a HELMET and BANDANNA?!?!?!??!! hahahahhahaha - You can see it in my eyes - looking at James like, "are you kidding me?" and it cracks me up.......because we had a freaking blast!

I'm trying to learn to enjoy the moments themselves......................

Woot! Woot! Huh? Wait....what? Nooooooooooooo

I can honestly say that one thing that I absolutely LOVE about myself (and that's something pretty hard for people to do) - I love my ability to have a good time!!!!!!!!!!! Hehehehehehehehehee!!! Loving it!

Some call it "childish" - I call it FUN. So much I don't understand though. For instance, what EXACTLY makes me have a good time? Just being silly? Doing something I shouldn't be doing? Succeeding really well in something others might think I won't? Hmmmmm........I don't know what it is. But when I am LAUGHING.....HARD.....You know I am truly happy. As in this picture. My friends were trying to get me to do the Guns N Roses thing where you sling back and forth......my friends appreciated my effort here.....others would say....Good Lord........make her sit down. Just know...hahha....I was having a blast....even if it was at my own expense!

Stupid is...as Stupid does.......

Hahahaha - ok, first off, this picture....soooooo not cute and soooooooo makes me laugh!!!!!!

The reason I picked it being that I am the one who is STUPID. I ate a piece of SPICEY fried chicken from Fricken Chicken. I mean, I ate it.....clawed into it - dug out each piece of spicy coated juicy yummy meat. And I ATE IT!

Of course I washed my hands....to the extent that I needed to?....C'mon now....that's a little too time consuming for my bedtime ritual. Which happens to be....Wipe the makeup off, take out the eyes, put on the glasses....BAM in bed. Simple as that. However......I had a little mishap in my ritual. During my "take my eyes out" part. I felt the most excruciating pain ever known to the human eyeball. Don't panic....yes, my eyes are still in tact. And I think I can see clearly. But we shall know tomorrow morning when I try to put the bloody suckers back in. Phewwwww......Spicy.....gotta love it - but it gets you everytime. You always end up sticking that finger somewhere it shouldn't be - even if you did wash it.!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hehehehehe