You may laugh......but this is how I feel......

So so so.......Let me start from the very beginning. I have anxiety of no one I have ever met. I just freak out. In this instance, I signed up for some dance classes. You know, the Rumba, Cha Cha, Swing, Fox Trot, Tango.....which to me is "Blah blah blah....blah blah blah blah." Oh and the Waltz, I think I learned the Waltz. When I tell you that I have to muster all the courage that I have to open the door each day and walk in and say, "I'm here for my lesson"........that's a lot for me. I don't know why I'm such a freak about it. I begin to get the shakes......then the uncontrollable giggles come.......and then the ultimate humiliation begins. I begin to drip. And yes for all you wonder what I could possibly be dripping.....it is that of my own SWEAT!!!!!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! I gross my self out with that. My partner and I are constantly having to wipe our hands and that makes me feel like.....welll.....a gross piece of yuck. Because to be honest with you. If I was teaching someone to dance and they melted on every piece of my body.....I'd be a little grossed out. So it was $97 for the Introductory Lesson. Which included 4 sessions of humiliation and a double session of humiliation times 2. Oh, and a party at the end where we all get together and I get to sweat on all of them. hahhahaha.......sorry, I just now really made myself laugh. It really is embarrassing. At my last session, my instructor told me that it was going to be $1600 for the next package.

I had to ask him to repeat himself. $1600 for the next package? There are ladies in their 70's dancing circles around me in there!!! So....I think I have decided to stick with it and pay the money. Because I think it will help with my anxiety. I am still frightened that I will be that skittish old lady who pees her pants if anyone so much as tells her "Hi".

Also, I am hoping that with the next lesson I feel more comfortable to take the bag off my head.